Happy Valentine’s Day to those love birds out there! Lengthy post ahead.
I’m curios… Really curious… So many friends got hitched, some expecting, some already have children, some got engaged, some in steady relationship… Me? I’m already 25 this year and I’m not belong to any of those mentioned! I sounded so desperate. I’m feeling the pressure now… -_-” biological clock is ticking too…*smack head*
I’m curious. Do you ever make a “plan” to yourself? The “plan” or fantasy to be exact. Things like when you want to get married? When do you want to have children? Career aside as I’m talking about relationship stuff now. *BLEK* Mind to share yours with me? I don’t want any advices, thank you. I just want to know about you. I’m sure almost everyone has/had this fantasy before or even now. Com’on, admit it!
It’s not fair that you share yours with me if I don’t share mine with you. This is my first time exposing one of my very personal stuff to you in this blog. No one knows about it before except me and Kev(my late-bf, if you still don’t know. I don’t want to talk about how he left, if you would like to know, you will have to go tru’ my previous archive, to make your life easy, it’s in 2005). DUH~ Already said that it’s personal stuff, how can I expect people to share it with me summore openly like this. Stupid… Stupid… I still hope that some will share coz some people do not see it as personal 😛
Ever since I’m in my teens, I had already drew up a “plan” on my relationship future. I want to get married when I’m 25, have children when I’m 27 and close my factory at the age of 33. Hahaha… So that’s my fantasy. I’ve been sticking to it until now but 🙁 I’m 25 this year and I’m still not in a relationship!! I’m supposed to get married this year!! OH NO… My time is up!(-_-“)
I told Kev this when he proposed to me not long after we start. We were net friend for almost a year before I agree to accept him. He asked me this at the beginning of our relationship. I told him that it’s still too early. So he asked me when do I want to get married as he’s ready anytime. So happy till can float you know? We even talked about our future such as how to raise our children, how many children we want to have, where are we living, our expectations to each other, so on and so forth. All these in the beginning of the relationship, fast huh? This is because we wanted to make sure that we didn’t waste too much time on each other if it happened that we had different expectations. In a long distant relationship, there isn’t much time to waste. Every chance that we had for each other was fully utilised to the max. Back then, I was only 22. He’s my first and serious boyfriend. I had never had any before. I’m such a good girl. Hahaha… The timing was perfect! Since we’re having long distant relationahip, dating for 3 years should be quite normal. All left now are just memories.
Now the questions:
When do you think is the best time to get married? What are the factors? Follow your guts and instincts? Or you have certain goal set such as financial stability before settling down? Goes with the flow? etc.
For me, financial security/stability is very important to me besides love. There is a phase where you are looking for love, love is all you want, you don’t care about other stuff but love, love is everything to you. After this phase is over, you are starting to look for some sort of security/stability, it can be financial, emotional, spiritual or physical. Love is important too but you will be seeking for something else besides love. I’m in the later phase now. In fact I’m in the later phase since a long long time ago.
Don’t start lecturing me! I know what you are going to say. It’s been going on and on and on like a broken record. I know that money is not everything but it’s something. Something that you can’t live without in this world. Everything is about money nowadays. I’m sure you know that women and children are not cheap, they cost you a lot of money.
One thing for sure is that no matter how rich you are, if we don’t have any chemistry between us, I’m not going to accept you. I’m not blind by money. I still let my heart do the talking. Only that the chance of having me considering you will be higher if you have more money. *EVIL GRIN* Usually I’ll be up front about this matter to anyone that express interest in me. If you can take it, you are in; if you can’t, I will advise you to find someone else.
This explains very well why I’m still single after he left. Actually my main problem is not this. There’s another problem that I’m having which I will not reveal it here. Only some people know about it. I’m not making it public. You will know when it’s solved.
I’m getting married this year? In my dream! Time is running out… Pressure is getting more and more intense… Seeing everyone taking their life to the next phase but I’m still here at the same spot.
Now… Let’s go back to the main questions in case you got lost after reading such long stuff from me:
– Do you have a future “plan” or fantasy like I mentioned just now?
– When do you think is the best time to get married? What are the factors? Follow your guts and instincts? Or you have certain goal set such as financial stability before settling down? Goes with the flow? etc.
Again, I don’t want to hear your lectures. I don’t want your advice. I only want you to share with me the two questions above.
when i was 21, i wanna get married at the age of 25-27 and get a baby before 30 , and when i was 25-27, i belum kahwin lagi, hahaha … now my plan is … ceremony this year, nex year buat anak, hahaha … but buat is say say nia, not ‘garantee’ sure kenak one ba, rite, hahaha …
Wahaha… Who knows… Very fast one ler. Hahaha… Some ppl, one month married only, just back from honeymoon not long, already pregnant 😛
mm.. my plan.. not on schedule ah.. hahaahaha.. might over due oso ah..
i’m another member of the missed the boat gang :p
dont be so fussy! maybe some of the bloggers here have the hots for you, u never know haha
the best time to get married is as early as possible, why waste time? if u both know u’re right for each other, just tie the knot…the problem is need to find the bf or gf first :/
Allen, Crispy, hahaha… yealo.. missing the boat soon. Of course, if can find the one sure no problem but can’t even find a gf/bf for a start how to get married 😛
mwahahaha. i knew this is coming. Almost every gal has this kind of “planning”. and it is NOT wise to share that with ur 2-months date. “M” topic always crack men’s nut :p
when i was just a little boy (really really very very little boy), my parents jokingly asked me when i wanna get married, i answered right after i finish high school. dun ask me why i said that, errr… kids says the darndest things, right?. hahahaha….. i still get teased over that statement until now :p
my mom always says if i didn’t earn enough money and get married, later wive and children will starve to hunger. so the most basic thing for me is to at least own a car and house and able to feed partner and spouse well. i’d prefer to be sole breadwinner, but believed partner should also work if financial situation doesn’t permit. this is a also to prevent her from turning into oversize “si lai”. ha ha….
– Do you have a future “plan” or fantasy like I mentioned just now?
No… I pretty felt that future is a hazy thing you cannot control. The only thing I felt that was within my control was how I can befriend guys, seduce the ones I like (though this case hubby did the seducing) and have a relationship. I wasn’t worried at all, about what will happen and if there is a possibility I will be left on the shelf. I did however, make a point of going out and meeting people… especially guys, even if nothing happened.
But I’ll tell you what I did fantasize about… the type of guy I would be dating. *lol* And no, I’m not going to say what type!
– When do you think is the best time to get married? What are the factors? Follow your guts and instincts? Or you have certain goal set such as financial stability before settling down? Goes with the flow? etc.
I’m going to sound like a feng shui prat, but here goes: when everything is in harmony. There… very feng shui right? *lol* But it makes sense… when you feel it in your heart that everything is going to turn out fine. When you and your partner are in love, and you’re pretty sure he won’t turn into a slob-slash-couch-potato of a husband whom you have to run after to retrieve his socks for laundry, and you’re both working so you’re both financially stable.. also of course you both have to have the same values and morality, and you both fight fairly. A lot of factors involved… but one of the most important one is does he respect you? It’s the simplest but most overlooked and downplayed question.
I still like the idea of the man proposing to his woman though… something timeless and classic about this. 🙂 And you’ll know when the time is right.
pretenders, *blek* I’m teasing you now 😛 Eh.. Not yet married meh? Hahahaha… I share your sentiment. There must be at least of certain financial state. I would prefer guy to be the sole breadwinner though the wife should contribute too but that depends on the situation. It freaks me out when a guy can’t even afford to feed himself -_-” which there are a lot nowadays -_-“
By the way, 2-month date? With who? Hahahah… Your gal talked about the “M” issue to you?
Lux, hahaha… You are the minority. Hehehe… Even Crispy and Allen, they are guy aslo have some sort of “planning” or “target” set for themselves hehehehe… Respect is sure a very important aspect in any relationship. When there is no respect to each other, I don’t think the relationship is going to work at all, don’t even say marriage but some how some people are too blind to see it. When they realised it, it’s too late already.
I also prefer the guy to propose hahahaha… I think if girl propose, she will scare the guy off 😛 Only minority of guys will accept it I guess…
Yeah, that’s exactly what I was trying to say! The ‘respect’ isn’t the obvious signs but I’m talking about the other things he doesn’t do… do I make sense here? Example, he gives you jewelry and roses and whatnot every week “just because”, but bitches about every guy you talk to (jealousy). Most girls just turn a blind eye (or is disillusioned) and say, “only because he loves me”
That was what I was trying to say. 🙂
Got it! 😛 Hahaha…
Thanks for the exposure
Ken, *Paiseh* 😛
Happy belated Valentine!
When I was 20-23, I planned (not really a plan…. just thinking about it only) to got married at 27. After that I didn’t bother about it. Had 9 years relationship before we got married *officially*. Our baby is due next month!
Any advise?
well, i dun mind if a rich sexy babe propose to me :p
honfui!! Long time no see! Happy Chinese New Year in advance! Any advice to you? 😛 No ler… Just take care of your wife and baby.
pretenders 😛 Hehehe… Why not? As long that you like.
Nice and daring reveal.
Everybody has fantasy on this. I was planning to marry a girl by 28 and I am still single now :p
hahah… it’s just fantasy… 😛
hhmm… so revealing…
when will i get married? when i can support both myself and my wife (at least some).
most planning doesn’t come out rite.
a ‘fren’ planned 2 things to be done b4 30. married and have kids. the later part already done… but no former. how??
“when i can support both myself and my wife (at least some)”, this I agree. Hahaha… I see, how? I can only laugh.
dun lie… you are smirking there… hehe…
You ask for it *smirk smirk* 😛
hahahaha…. am i’m the only one who fills up your 10 most recent comments?
wei… no contest for top commentor ah? donate la $10 per month for top commentor…
😀
Eeeee… Blek… Me stingy lar